Resilience is what we all seek in 2021. Resilience built on love. We can see the value in building this up more than ever before. HOW is a big question on which we will all want to reflect! How do we become more resilient? What is needed to sustain the resilience we gain in this VUCA world?

I start my year long focus on resilience with an exploration of what love has to say in answer to these questions.

2021 theme: resilience
January topic: love
Weekly Foci included:

  1. let me, the more loving one be;
  2. urgency as an expression of love;
  3. ringing down the armour; and,
  4. the Power in Love.

“How should we like it were stars to burn
With a passion for us we could not return?
If equal affection cannot be,
Let the more loving one be me.”  – W. H. Auden

Resilience built on love is reflected in this poem. Above is stanza 2 of Auden’s poem. Use this link and find an audio recording to listen and reflect on the significance of this poem. Listen to the recitation to embrace it even more deeply..

NEW FORMAT THIS YEAR

My blog is published monthly. The monthly topic will shed light on the theme of resilience.
Readers will find a quick review of the reflective questions in one section below.  Furthermore, I encourage my readers to choose at least one and spend some time reflecting on the question to identify any fresh insights that may surface. I will share some of mine in the section below.
Listen to the corresponding podcast to support  reflections. These are itemized with links in a separate section.
Additionally, reading my thoughts in the related newsletter will also offer context.
My hope is that this new format will provide both my readers and me with a foundation on which to build a reflective practice to help us become more resilient throughout the course of 2021.

What surfaced through the month?

In the first week,

I was inspired by the unique experience of a holiday framed by the need to accept that resilience is built on love. First because when we deeply experience and express love our brains are clearer, more open and therefore more resilient. Asking myself who I need to be to create what I want was a natural. I inquire about this with clients frequently in a variety of ways. Who do I need to be? This holiday season I thought a lot about the post pandemic and thought a lot about how I can prepare myself to be more open, courageous, curious and ultimately creative. How can I prepare to be this person?

In the second week,

I found myself hearing so many negative messages about the vaccine. The lack of urgency in Canada was and is disturbing. Finger pointing is the default. I have always considered myself someone who demonstrated urgency in my response to identifying and enacting solutions. It was a point of pride in my work. I sought out research and white papers on execution with both urgency and excellence. I shared a story during that week about a team where I felt the rush that accompanies the act of delivering on a demanding and urgent set of goals. As I reflected on where I could apply that now, it lit a fire under me.

Week three,

was the most powerful experience for me. I share in the newsletter about how my dad modeled a particular way of being that would require me to rethink my boundaries. I am slowly but surely experimenting with this in my life. It has already proven to inspire a risk taking vulnerability that feels resourceful in interesting ways. More than the other three weeks, this focus challenged me on a deeper quest of who I want to be. I want to be the person who says, “welcome, welcome, come on in.” I can’t right now during a pandemic but let this be a post-pandemic approach. Welcoming people into my life with more gusto! Isn’t that love? Doesn’t connection with others make us more resilient?

Week four

was an opportunity to reflect more on my natural way of showing love. It has been said that we all have our own unique love language. Some languages are better received than others. I suspect it is also in the delivery of the language. Mine is with what may be called tough love. I was always quick to offer family, friends and particularly direct reports with guidance and feedback. I saw it as my responsibility.

It could be exhausting but it was my mission. Often it was extremely well received, at least in time. Employees, in time, would joke about how demanding I could be. I had high expectations and wouldn’t rest until I made my points clear. Interestingly as people grew and because accomplished they would glow. I would acknowledge their hard work and progress and so often they would then express their many past frustration with me. Somehow, at some level my love came though. Thankfully.

The question of how I am contributing with and emphasis on mutual accountability and responsibility is my comfortable place. I think, with the reflections from earlier weeks, I will be kinder and more even more effective in expanding this strength,

 

 

This Month’s Reflective Questions 

Weekly focus for January:

  1. ONE: Who do you need to be to discover the future for which you are willing to persist?
  2. TWO: Where can I develop greater urgency by who I am being, to demonstrate my passion and love and expand my resilience in doing so.
  3. THREE: what is the armour I typically wear and what possibilities do I fail to see or realize as a result?
  4. FOUR:  how am I contributing to powerfully loving relationships in every aspect of my life to cultivate mutuality and shared accountability and responsibility? Moreover, how can I be a more effective mentor or support when opportunities present them self?
Weekly Podcast Episodes Quick Source
  1.  to be the more LOVING
  2. Shot in the Arm
  3. Armour Limits
  4. Power in Love
Weekly Newsletters for Review

1 resilience built on love - loving one be In this newsletter, “Be the More Loving One”, I examine the impact of unrequited love on our resilience.

2 resilience built on love - urgency

 

Acting with Urgency In the second newsletter I reflect on how action speaks louder than words when something matters.

3 resilience built on love - armour

In the third newsletter, My Boundaries are My Armour, I share a personal story to illustrate the benefit of loosening some boundaries.

Week four’s newsletter, “Love isn’t Necessarily Nice“. I reflect on the recent scandal in the office of the Governor General of Canada – Can the head of state – and on a personal experience with leadership who failed to deal with the difficult elements of leaderships.

My favorite Insight for the month

Interestingly, my favourite insight for the month is that there is powerful learning in each week for me. It is in seeing what surfaced weekly (see above) that my insight crystalized. In using my great strength which clearly resonated for me in week four I can act on the other three with authenticity.

Authenticity is always the goal. I’m more sentimental than most people would believe but I am squirrely around the saccharin. Perhaps I can exercise my love language with the courage to release my well defined boundaries, and become more resilient into the future. I will love the journey to figure this out.

 

An invitation to Walk with me.

Together let’s examine options consciously and authentically to make choices that move us strategically toward where we want to be.  Therefore, where my client wants to go, is my paramount focus. Strategy is a about choices. Execution on these choices requires masterful performance. Furthermore, a well-developed process allows us to enjoy the journey far more fully

 


Be part of the journey in 2021.

Start by subscribing to my mailing list . Subscribers receive:

  1. My interactive exercise to begin reducing the impacts of stress and feelings of overwhelm will be sent.
  2. My newsletter with the related podcast episode will be sent weekly.
  3. Special offers will be available to subscribers monthly including: a random offer of a complimentary one hour coaching conversation, access to roundtable engagements and group coaching on identity and related subjects, as well as information on an initiative on which I’m collaborating: #FeMasCon.

 

 

 

Invitation

Walk with Me!

 

  • BOOK a complimentary exploratory 1:1 conversation 20-30 minutes.
  • SUBSCRIBE to my mailing list. You’ll receive an interactive exercise that you may use to reduce and manage stress or feelings of overwhelm. PLUS each week you’ll receive my podcast and reflections in your inbox AND you’ll be invited to monthly webinars and roundtable conversations.