The Social Brain is being fiercely challenged right now. It is a time to remember, what fires together wires together. New learning, understanding and skills relies on our ability to wire the connections together.

To survive, even thrive we must learn to honour our collective responsibility to protect the very breath that makes those.

“Neurons which fire together, survive together and wire together.”

– Weiss & Post

Human beings are social. It is fundamental to our survival as a species. That’s what makes the pandemic and all social challenges so integral to our struggles and our capacity to thrive.

The 2020 theme of identity continues. Data demonstrates how readily our identity is defined by our social engagement. Additionally, our social brains deeply impact our experience of threats and rewards so our tightly aligned with our performance.

In the Kickass Koach podcast episode dropped June 1st, I share the example of a client. This client realized the insight by how brain connections helped him learn to play piano. He found a lesson to apply this process in how he performs as a leader.

For the newsletter, I offer an insight I gleaned from a lecture given by an Adlerian Psychologist likening connections in the universe to how our social brain fires off and makes connections in learning.

In my weekly Instagram video, I attempt to see this phenomenon in our struggle to move beyond our tribe so we respect and integrate with those who have a different life experience. I wonder about whether greater integration of people, regardless of differences, would change the way we engage, making life experience more equitable.

Finally, in this post I break down how connections are made and the significance of wiring them together to improve performance and a meaningful existence.

Firing Together is the Place to Start

Our social brain is constantly seeking to make connections. We want to understand what is going on in the world. Moreover we seek to understand what’s going on within our self as well. Furthermore, when the connections fire off successfully and the message is appealing, the wiring takes hold quickly and both habits and beliefs form. Strangely, even when the connections that fire together are threatening, they take hold deeply too. That is the scariest part of the social brain.

When we work collaboratively with others, we feel differently about those people. Moreover, superior interpersonal skills are essential for successful collaboration. This means each of us must take responsibility for building skills, knowledge and increased capacity.

Firing together means connecting. Connection between people is generative. When our neurons are firing off and landing, we feel keenly aware and interested in the other person. This is how a relationship-orientation in an organization generates power.

Be mindful of these connections. What fuels them and sustains them? What produces them, will often determine the outcomes they produce. The source of connections is critical to achieving the results we desire.

Wiring Together Solidifies Powerful Connections

The wiring together of connections can be an uplifting experience. Unfortunately, in this same process,conspiracy theories thrive. Essentially, this is the reason anything goes viral.

This is exactly what makes the source, as discussed above, critical.

Fundamentally, when we wire together the destructive connections, we create devastating outcomes.

Recently, the destructive potential is illustrated in police violence. In this case systemic racism is a virus. When we deeply wire together connections within a group, we build resentment, foster fear and exaggerate threats from the “other”. This appears to justify all manner of group-think behaviour. That is evident in the blue line and the silent acquiescence when witnessing horrific behaviour, perpetrated by fellow members of the group.

Thankfully, the opposite is also true. A connection to “BlackLivesMatter messages and a belief in humanity and the hopefulness of coming together, fuels solidarity in fighting back against the powers-that-be. This results in unifying marches for peace and justice.

Life is one big Experiment

As we are all confronted both by the viral pandemic and the social pandemic of racism, it’s painfully obvious to see we have some firing and wiring work to do. It requires a iterative approach. We haven’t gotten it right so far. Furthermore, we’ve taken slow incremental steps on both fronts. Even as a centuries old travesty like systemic racism, we’ve failed to move the needle. We suffer from a deficit in our understanding. With an experimental collaborative approach we may find progress is faster and we go further. Moreover, I’m reminded of the beautiful African proverb. “If you want to go fast go alone, if you want to go further go together.” In collaboration we can crack this, but only together with a willingness to learn and honour the data and the stories will we arrive where

We may be capable of more closely monitoring and learning from our choices and decisions and build capacity to adjust our actions to meet the current situation. Then, we may influence how things unfold. There’s a difference between wanting something and making something happen. With the mindset necessary to perform under pressure we are able to influence results more deeply. This mindset that relies on clarity, curiosity and a resilient spirit we accept no excuses, only meaningful results. Furthermore, it’s essential we have a system to evaluate the risk of any action, removing the very human emotions that cloud our judgment. Walk with me. Together let’s examine options consciously and authentically to make choices that move us strategically toward where we want to be. Strategy is a about choices. Execution on these choices requires masterful performance. Furthermore, a well developed process allows us to enjoy the journey far more fully.

Be part of the journey in 2020.

Start by subscribing to my mailing list . Subscribers receive:

My interactive exercise to begin reducing the impacts of stress and feelings of overwhelm will be sent.
My newsletter with the related podcast episode will be sent weekly.
Special offers will be available to subscribers monthly including: a random offer of a complimentary one hour coaching conversation, access to roundtable engagements and group coaching on identity and related subjects, as well as information on an initiative on which I’m collaborating: #FeMasCon.

The Neurons are Firing with Bank Your Impact (BYI)

Our 85 billion neurons are seeking to firing at any time. Choosing where to direct their attention is critical. Moreover, it’s our responsibility to focus on the skills, knowledge and capacities that move us to where we want to be. A career built on the skill of navigating and responding to opportunities as they arise is generative and progressive.

The BYI system helps participants build the strength to engage when challenges appear. It’s an approach focused on identifying options, making wise choices and committing to influencing desired outcomes. Furthermore, it takes a systematic and experiential approach to influence the outcomes we produce. Moreover, becoming aware of who we are being and how it produces the results in our life is a consequence of the choices we made and how we execute on those choices. Ultimately, creating the life we want starts with the actions we choose to take.

To get what we truly want in life, we need to be willing to persist, seek help, and continually look for transferable learning opportunities. Additionally, we need to be willing to question our choices and expand our options through healthy curiosity and a search for unique perspectives. Moreover, identifying and nurturing our identity is the place to start. A healthy meaningful and full life is made possible with clarity about our values, beliefs, patterns and habits. Additionally, our quality of life is influenced and shaped by our unique blend of strengths and inclinations. Undoubtedly, a growth mindset and open-minded approach are foundations to sustaining this healthy sense of self.

The System

The Bank Your Impact (BYI) System is about both developing and embedding self-awareness. Furthermore, the benefits of expanded resilience, connections built on understanding the impact of belonging and an ability to bolster a professional and authentic presence are foundational. Perhaps more than the other two, developing a foundational resilience is critical to with standing that which moves us into burnout.

The current system incorporates 1:1 coaching, roundtable conversations; eventually I’ll add a neuro-social learning experience (currently only available in organizational contracts but will be added to the system for individual engagement in 2021). My approach is based on the ICF (International Coaching Federation) standards. I’m meeting you (my clients) where you are, both as the coaching agreement begins, and in the moment that exists at the time of each conversation. Progress or growth is not a straight line. The ICA model is the framework for every conversation: Issue/Insight, Choice/Commitment, Action/Accountability. Over the past year I’ve been tightening the model to meet the needs of my clients.

Holding space to support my clients in:

Developing meaningful insights
Expanding/deepening perspective on those insights
Building/designing a practice to try on new ways of being/seeing OR experiment for discovery
Assessing progress, becoming agile in transfer of learning and application before developing additional insights

An organic experience

The experience is tailored around what you bring to each conversation, in my experience, there are common themes that arise including: self-awareness, mindfulness, mindset, communication, connections, and attitude. Self-awareness stands alone but is also a foundational theme. I have registered upwards of 40 sub-concepts that fit under each of these categories. Furthermore, I bring tools, skills and techniques to respond and guide our work together, informed by positive psychology, neuroscience, and management/leadership research.

Walk With Me, to Where You Want to Be

In all my blog posts in 2019, you will find this section outlines what brought me to this area of focus: supporting people in the early to middle part of their career as a #performance #coach.

You can read more about my work and my in the About Me section of the website and below is a recording of my #bigwhystory:

Feel like you’re living someone else’s destiny?

If that’s working for you, great. If it isn’t or it starts to be a problem, reach out. I welcome a conversation.

Willing to do the work to find more meaning?

With the skills to unpack the emotions and barriers and triggers and mindset challenges with the skills in my BYI system, participants begin to see the impact in their career and finally begin to discover what matters most to them. The bonus: they begin to see a path to get there. Join me… My system is intended to be meaningful, relevant, accessible and affordable. With that in mind, there are many ways to engage with me. Below are TWO ways to start, without spending a dime.

Walk with Me!

BOOK a complimentary exploratory 1:1 conversation 20-30 minutes.
SUBSCRIBE to my mailing list. You’ll receive an interactive exercise that you may use to reduce and manage stress or feelings of overwhelm. PLUS each week you’ll receive my podcast and reflections in your inbox AND you’ll be invited to monthly webinars and roundtable conversations.

In closing, I love bringing learning experiences to workplaces that are interested in raising their performance and encouraging their people.

Book me to speak at your conference or to a group in your organization. My workshops on building resilience, improving workplace outcomes through relationships, and increasing performance are big hits! In 2020 I’ve added a few workshops on gender engagement – how, by knocking off the boxes that limit us by gender we all find our capacity expands.

The Social Brain Wires Together What Fires Together