In the Kickass Koach podcast episode dropped Monday, I share how my mentor coach began our engagement recognizing the importance of diving deeply. Moreover, I reflect on how the process of aging is one of continuously seeing the value in diving deeply into knowing oneself.
For the newsletter, I share the story of a client, Helena. This client contracted with me precisely because of the prospect of diving deeply to figure out what her destiny could be.
In the weekly Instagram and LinkedIn video I talk about a favourite former co-worker. Specifically, how my initial assumptions about him were limited by my early experience with him. This changed when I allowed more evidence to seep in. In other words, more evidence shifted how I experienced him and reminded me of how important it is to dive for the riches that are often hidden in us all.
Finally in this post I attempt to dive into the four basic questions of learning. Why is diving deeply a goal we should pursue? What does diving deeply look like in practice? How can each of us get started? What if we do and what if we don’t pursue this practice?
Diving Deeply – Why and What?
The why and what of diving deeply are connected. Here I argue the why in terms of the benefits. Whereas, I speak to the what by examining how it may be experienced.
Why to invest in the practice of diving deeply
What we see and how we perceive it is based on the context of the situation. Self knowledge gives us data on which to build our response to opportunities as well as threats.
Self-awareness makes me more capable of seeing options and opportunities to improve my messages in communication. I am able to adjust when I recognize and understand my feelings in reaction. Moreover, I have the choice to engage my self-regulation skills.
If we are able to recognize a trigger in real-time, we are less susceptible to its influence. This ensures we make less problems for our self.
More options and pathways are revealed when we understand the context in which we are operating. Furthermore, the context is more vivid with greater depth of understanding.
We all make better choices when more options are available.
What is included in the practice of diving deeply
In other words, what are we looking for or what are we exploring in the dive?
The dive includes an exploration of beliefs. Beliefs form and limit identity. Moreover, many of them are hidden. We are often surprised when we learn some of the limiting beliefs that guide our thinking. I was shocked to realize I carried the belief that men were more effective leaders than women are. It was embedded until I rooted it out.
A deep dive examines our mindset. Mindset is formed out of beliefs. A belief colours or informs our mindset. Carol Dweck researches, writes and lectures on mindset. She divides it into the growth and fixed forms. Dweck’s work indicates how we move between the two in different areas of our life. We are more apt to make healthy changes when we are able to see the limitations in our behaviour and connect it to a limiting belief.
The rich elements below the surface include our patterns and resulting habits. Our results and outcomes are directly connected to our behaviour. Behaviour is simply a series of actions. A series of actions become habits when performed repeatedly and subconsciously. Habits, over time, become patterns.
Our identity develops and is projected into the world through all of these elements. When we understand and are able to see the connections, we are able to adjust appropriately
Diving Deeply – How and What-If?
The how and what-if inquiries are also connected. Here I offer ideas on how we get started in diving deeply. The exercise is personal and varied. Conversely, the what-if approach may actually be more structured, depending on one’s perspective.
How to get started in practicing the art of diving deeply
Diving deeply may be limited to engaging in therapy for some. While others may see it in the act of self-reflection. This may be something we’ve come to know as a mindfulness practice. In other words, it takes many forms. We have options from which to choose.
What we see and how we perceive it is based on the context of the situation. Self-awareness offers data points. With more data points, build more powerful responses. The helps us respond more effectively to both opportunities and threats. The first responsibility we have is building our plan of action.
First on my list is engaging a coach. A coach is a thinking partner. One of the clear benefits of working with a coach is improved thinking and discernment skills. The underlying goal of any skilled coach is to support their client to dive deeply.
Secondly, some people build or find a support team with whom they can engage in the dive. Undoubtedly, this is why many entrepreneurs engage in a similar practice in the form of a master mind. There is merit in the benefits of social learning and exploration.
Thirdly we may consider a focused meditation and/or journaling practice. This is a powerful way to unearth what lies beneath the surface. It requires a lot of discipline. Unlike coaching and social engagement, this practice offers less accountability.
Fourthly, and this is most beneficial when combined with one of the above, we may find a research or book review on related subjects of interest. Provided the reading material is challenging and thought provoking insights developed can support the deep dive.
What-if scenarios or not
I happen to love the what if approach to learning. It focuses on the transfer-ability of intentional discovery. By seeking options and weighing them, as we do in this approach, we are forced to dig not only more deeply into the discovery but the impact of that new insight. That’s powerful. Moreover, that is how we create and build our own destiny.
Consider examining scenarios to explore in a deep dive.
It is a position of inquiry. A perspective of curiosity. When we reflect with a what-if approach we are more creative and generative. Our contribution grows and new insights emerge. Things improve and learning happens when we are all will to take more of a what-if approach.
Life is one big Experiment
We can all start by approaching life as an experiment. Each day will offer wondrous insights and lessons. Diving deeply into who we are and what we want out of our time helps us know how and where to expend our energy. Finally, what will we experiment to move our purpose forward in 2020?
Walk with me. Let’s go on a deep dive and discover the wondrous nature of our identity.
Be part of the journey in 2020.
Start by subscribing to my mailing list . Subscribers receive:
- My interactive exercise to begin reducing the impacts of stress and feelings of overwhelm will be sent.
- My newsletter with the related podcast episode will be sent weekly.
- Special offers will be available to subscribers monthly including: a random offer of a complimentary one hour coaching conversation, access to roundtable engagements and group coaching on identity and related subjects, as well as information on an initiative on which I’m collaborating: #FeMasCon.
Diving Deeply is the Purpose of Bank Your Impact (BYI)
The entire purpose and intention of the BYI system is diving deeply. Moreover, the processes of diving deeply is both pleasurable and taxing. Furthermore, creating the life we want starts with wading through the thickest sludge and darkest gulfs to see what is there. Most clients express delight at some point. A client actually told me, “I haven’t spent this much time with another person focusing on what I want and how to get it before in my life. Turns out I’m fascinating and worth getting to know.” Frankly, we all enjoy a deep dive. The activity serves an important purpose.
Furthermore, to get what we truly want in life, we need to be willing to persist, seek help, and continually look for transferable learning opportunities. Additionally, we need to be willing to question our choices and expand our options through healthy curiosity and a search for unique perspectives. Furthermore, identifying and nurturing our identity is the place to start.
A healthy meaningful and full life is made possible with clarity about our values, beliefs, patterns and habits. Additionally, our quality of life is influenced and shaped by our unique blend of strengths and inclinations. Undoubtedly, a growth mindset and open-minded approach are foundations to sustaining this healthy sense of self.
The System
The Bank Your Impact (BYI) System is about both developing and embedding self-awareness. Furthermore, the benefits of expanded resilience, connections built on understanding the impact of belonging and an ability to bolster a professional and authentic presence are foundational. Perhaps more than the other two, developing a foundational resilience is critical to with standing that which moves us into burnout.
The current system incorporates 1:1 coaching, roundtable conversations; eventually I’ll add a neuro-social learning experience (currently only available in organizational contracts but will be added to the system for individual engagement in 2021).
My approach is based on the ICF (International Coaching Federation) standards. I’m meeting you (my clients) where you are, both as the coaching agreement begins, and in the moment that exists at the time of each conversation. Progress or growth is not a straight line. The ICA model is the framework for every conversation: Issue/Insight, Choice/Commitment, Action/Accountability. Over the past year I’ve been tightening the model to meet the needs of my clients.
Holding space to support my clients in:
- Developing meaningful insights
- Expanding/deepening perspective on those insights
- Building/designing a practice to try on new ways of being/seeing OR experiment for discovery
- Assessing progress, becoming agile in transfer of learning and application before developing additional insights
An organic experience
The experience is tailored around what you bring to each conversation, in my experience, there are common themes that arise including: self-awareness, mindfulness, mindset, communication, connections, and attitude. Self-awareness stands alone but is also a foundational theme. I have registered upwards of 40 sub-concepts that fit under each of these categories. Furthermore, I bring tools, skills and techniques to respond and guide our work together, informed by positive psychology, neuroscience, and management/leadership research.
Walk With Me, to Where You Want to Be
In all my blog posts in 2019, you will find this section outlines what brought me to this area of focus: supporting people in the early to middle part of their career as a #performance #coach.
You can read more about my work and my in the About Me section of the website and below is a recording of my #bigwhystory:
Feel like you’re living someone else’s destiny?
If that’s working for you, great. If it isn’t or it starts to be a problem, reach out. I welcome a conversation.
Willing to do the work to find more meaning?
With the skills to unpack the emotions and barriers and triggers and mindset challenges with the skills in my BYI system, participants begin to see the impact in their career and finally begin to discover what matters most to them. The bonus: they begin to see a path to get there. Join me…
My system is intended to be meaningful, relevant, accessible and affordable. With that in mind, there are many ways to engage with me. Below are TWO ways to start, without spending a dime.
Walk with Me!
- BOOK a complimentary exploratory 1:1 conversation 20-30 minutes.
- SUBSCRIBE to my mailing list. You’ll receive an interactive exercise that you may use to reduce and manage stress or feelings of overwhelm. PLUS each week you’ll receive my podcast and reflections in your inbox AND you’ll be invited to monthly webinars and roundtable conversations.
In closing, I love bringing learning experiences to workplaces that are interested in raising their performance and encouraging their people.
- Book me to speak at your conference or to a group in your organization. My workshops on building resilience, improving workplace outcomes through relationships, and increasing performance are big hits! In 2020 I’ve added a few workshops on gender engagement – how, by knocking off the boxes that limit us by gender we all find our capacity expands.