Messy or Empty? It’s a false choice. Stop judging the mess, dive in to find the unbalanced emotions or thinking crying out from the mess. By recognizing the underlying message, learning and growth will emerged..
“If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?” – Albert Einstein
The 2020 theme of identity continues with this week’s focused exploration. It is interesting how our identity is shaped by the early lessons we experience and perhaps as much by how we internalize them.
In the Kickass Koach podcast episode dropped July 13th, I reflect on how, during this pandemic I allowed my home office to become so messy and cluttered it forced me out to my kitchen table to work. It was in finally restoring order to my den that I made a few powerful discoveries.
For the newsletter, I share the story of a debilitating mess that drove me to fire a direct report followed by a story of engaging in a messy conversation and feeling refreshed by the emotionally charged experience.
Finally, in this post I dig into Einstein’s apparent affinity for a messy desk. I examine the impact of a messy environment and posit that cluttered space or empty space is, after all, a false choice. Additionally, I explore the impact of a cluttered or messy inner life.
Messy or Empty: the choice described
Messy makes some feel busy. Still we know that we must optimize the most mundane. When we routinize the daily good habits they become patterns in time and until we disrupt the flow they offer, we risk getting lost in the clutter.
Is Einstein, Albert Einstein, the noted theoretical physicist accurately assigned ownership of this quote. I am not convinced.
That said, I fear he has been taken out of context.
Einstein is known for arguing that insight and learning is not linear or an gentle process. It is aided by disharmony and shifts and challenges along the way. When we read this quote with that in mind it suggests the deepest, most meaningful insights are found in the strangest places. Moreover, they are possible in the midst of chaos and discomfort. I have no trouble accepting that.
Perhaps wisdom or insight or discovery happens despite the messiness or in the act of creating order out of the clutter.
Messy or Empty: the environment
Our external environment powerfully impacts our internal one. In the newsletter I speak to the overwhelming impact of a direct reports extremely untidy office. Perhaps there are degrees of clutter but in my experience, order in my office frees me to invite and allow more intense disorder or uncomfortable emotions from within.
When I consider my childhood. There was a period when my room was perfectly neat and tidy. Later, as a teenager, it was a hoarder’s paradise. Still, I recall leaving my room and engaging in other areas of my home that were beautifully neat and tidy. I never did my project work in my room. I used that space to read or listen to music or day dream. That worked in the mess. Additionally, I recall visiting at my friends’ homes, many of which looked a lot more like my room. They and I preferred to come to my place where it was less chaotic.
As I reflect on my journey of performance and growth, I see with some clarity how allowing messiness to gather had some merit. Permitting it to fester brought confusion, chaos and failure. By acknowledging and doing the work to sift through the clutter around us, we potentially find insights, options and awareness that would otherwise be lost for the ages.
Messy or Empty: the internal journey
Feeling or even being messy on the inside is inevitable. Staying that way is avoidable, with concerted effort. Just as I mention the learning when I dove into the mess that grew in my den over the early part of the pandemic, so will profound insights reveal them self when we are willing to dive deeply within. My mentor coach, back in 2013 told me something I bring to every single coaching engagement. People often choose to snorkel through their life but for meaningful insights and clarity of purpose and identity, a good coach helps them choose to give up their snorkeling equipment and pick up the scuba diving gear. that is where all the beauty and profound impact is waiting to be discovered.
We are all messy inside. Those who recognize the mess are willing to learn from it. Those afraid to live their best life are destined to stay at the surface. I choose to believe it was his awareness of the richness available in the mess of which Einstein spoke. We only benefit from the chaos when we do the work to dive in
Life is one big Experiment
An experimental, iterative, approach to life is not foreign to Albert Einstein. Challenging a quote attributed to him may seem like a sacrilegious act. That said, a person with an experimental, curious or growth mindset is destined to challenge everything, even a genius. Perhaps I see things differently. It is again, all in how we choose to see anything. When life is an experiment, we focus on what we can learn about our self and about the world. As Einstein’s fellow theoretical physicist said, “When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change.” – Max Planck
Continuous learning and fresh insights are the goal of the experimental approach. What will the evidence teach us? Moreover, this approach is generative in addition to being iterative. With an experimental collaborative approach, we may find progress is faster and we go further. In collaboration we can crack this, but only together with a willingness to learn and honour the data and the stories will we arrive where we seek to go.
We may be capable of more closely monitoring and learning from our choices and decisions and build capacity to adjust our actions to meet the current situation. Then, we may influence how things unfold. There’s a difference between wanting something and making something happen. With the mindset necessary to perform under pressure we’re able to influence results more deeply. This mindset that relies on clarity, curiosity and a resilient spirit we accept no excuses, only meaningful results. Furthermore, it’s essential we learn to evaluate the risk of any action, removing the very human emotions that cloud our judgment.
Walk with me.
Together let’s examine options consciously and authentically to make choices that move us strategically toward where we want to be. Where may client wants to go is my paramount focus. Strategy is a about choices. Execution on these choices requires masterful performance. Furthermore, a well-developed process allows us to enjoy the journey far more fully
Be part of the journey in 2020.
Start by subscribing to my mailing list . Subscribers receive:
- My interactive exercise to begin reducing the impacts of stress and feelings of overwhelm will be sent.
- My newsletter with the related podcast episode will be sent weekly.
- Special offers will be available to subscribers monthly including: a random offer of a complimentary one hour coaching conversation, access to roundtable engagements and group coaching on identity and related subjects, as well as information on an initiative on which I’m collaborating: #FeMasCon.
De-clutter the Mind with Bank Your Impact (BYI)
The System
The Bank Your Impact (BYI) System is about both developing and embedding self-awareness. Furthermore, the benefits of expanded resilience, connections built on understanding the impact of belonging and an ability to bolster a professional and authentic presence are foundational. Perhaps more than the other two, developing a foundational resilience is critical to with standing that which moves us into burnout.
The current system incorporates 1:1 coaching, roundtable conversations; eventually I’ll add a neuro-social learning experience (currently only available in organizational contracts but will be added to the system for individual engagement in 2021). My approach is based on the ICF (International Coaching Federation) standards. I’m meeting you (my clients) where you are, both as the coaching agreement begins, and in the moment that exists at the time of each conversation. Progress or growth is not a straight line. The ICA model is the framework for every conversation: Issue/Insight, Choice/Commitment, Action/Accountability. Over the past year I’ve been tightening the model to meet the needs of my clients.
Holding space to support my clients in:
- Developing meaningful insights
- Expanding/deepening perspective on those insights
- Building/designing a practice to try on new ways of being/seeing OR experiment for discovery
- Assessing progress, becoming agile in transfer of learning and application before developing additional insights
An organic experience
The experience is tailored around what you bring to each conversation, in my experience, there are common themes that arise including: self-awareness, mindfulness, mindset, communication, connections, and attitude. Self-awareness stands alone but is also a foundational theme. I have registered upwards of 40 sub-concepts that fit under each of these categories. Furthermore, I bring tools, skills and techniques to respond and guide our work together, informed by positive psychology, neuroscience, and management/leadership research.
Walk With Me, to Where You Want to Be
In all my blog posts in 2019, you will find this section outlines what brought me to this area of focus: supporting people in the early to middle part of their career as a #performance #coach.
Feel like you’re living someone else’s destiny?
If that’s working for you, great. If it isn’t or it starts to be a problem, reach out. I welcome a conversation.
Willing to do the work to find more meaning?
With the skills to unpack the emotions and barriers and triggers and mindset challenges with the skills in my BYI system, participants begin to see the impact in their career and finally begin to discover what matters most to them. The bonus: they begin to see a path to get there. Join me… My system is intended to be meaningful, relevant, accessible and affordable. With that in mind, there are many ways to engage with me. Below are TWO ways to start, without spending a dime.
Walk with Me!
- BOOK a complimentary exploratory 1:1 conversation 20-30 minutes.
- SUBSCRIBE to my mailing list. You’ll receive an interactive exercise that you may use to reduce and manage stress or feelings of overwhelm. PLUS each week you’ll receive my podcast and reflections in your inbox AND you’ll be invited to monthly webinars and roundtable conversations.
In closing, I love bringing learning experiences to workplaces that are interested in raising their performance and encouraging their people.
- Book me to speak at your conference or to a group in your organization. My workshops on building resilience, improving workplace outcomes through relationships, and increasing performance are big hits! In 2020 I’ve added a few workshops on gender engagement – how, by knocking off the boxes that limit us by gender we all find our capacity expands.Love