In the Kickass Koach podcast episode dropped Monday, I reflect on a young Canadian pitcher, and All-Star for the Atlanta Braves. I was inspired by comments made about how his early success is a result of his well defined and nurtured identity.
For the newsletter I share a curiosity I have about how as we learn more about the nuances of our own identity and articulate them, those around us challenge our honest self assessments. Is it to protect us or define us?
In the weekly Instagram and LinkedIn video I wonder about how we’ve given up the naming rights to our own identity. I challenge us to take them back.
Finally in this post my emphasis is on two ways of examining how and why identity matters.
Identity Matters Identified
There are a few aspects that make up matters of identity. Identity is my annual theme so I imagine I’ll identify additional aspects over the course of the year. If I don’t, it will be disappointing! That said, I want to outline three matters that fall into the make-up of identity as a starting place for our exploration. These and more will be part of future posts and reflections. Furthermore, this isn’t intended as an exhaustive examination.
Strengths
Are our strengths static and fixed? Not likely. We do have patterns of behaviour that reveal common strengths. Still, we are able to develop strengths when desired or needed as well.
One of my strengths is perspective. A definition of perspective as a strength is: being able to provide wise counsel to others or the ability to access ways of looking at the world that make sense and support learning and wisdom. It’s likely easy to appreciate how this strength is malleable to the situation. When I’m using it in a healthy way, my capacity to see more broadly supports my own development. Additionally, it adds value to those I serve. When I apply this strength in excess, I offer unsolicited advice and even over analyze my own behaviour. Greater awareness of my strength allows me to calibrate its application.
Our strengths and how we use them impact how we recognize, value and project our identity. It is embedded in how we see our self and demonstrated in how we apply it in the world.
The manifestation of strengths is a matter of identity.
Character Traits
Our character traits reflect and inform our identity as well. Some may debate whether character is formed through genes or socialization. I lean most heavily on the impact of socialization. However, there are very credible arguments for the significant impact of heredity. Regardless, no one would argue that character traits are not a core matter in one’s identity.
One of my character traits is boldness. Boldness, which, according to one of the cool tools I use in my practice, Tilt 365, is a sister to courage and a polar opposite to consideration. In other words I’m not always considerate in my bold pronouncements. As a girl growing up I was chastised often for not being nice. Thankfully I was encouraged for my boldness by a handful of people in my life which allowed me to foster this part of my identity rather than push it into the recesses of my nature.
Over time we either choose to accept and learn to regulate our character traits in healthy ways or we reject them and live the way others expect.
Values
When our values are stepped on by another, we are offended. Our blend of values, again likely most influenced by our socialization, are a matter of our identity. In fact, our values when not mined or understood or appreciated will quietly erode opportunities, relationships and thinking in dangerous ways. Our very sense of identity is tied to our values
Identity Matters Because
Who we are and what we contribute matters, hence our identity matters. Moreover, knowing and even adapting our identity to navigate situations effectively is only possible with ever-growing self-awareness.
When we know our self we make choices that align with our values. This increases our resilience and ultimately improves our overall performance, job satisfaction, creativity and thinking skills.
Identity matters because it is the foundation to who we are, what makes us tick, how we think and how we respond or react to situations. When a great opportunity or a serious challenge presents it self, the person who has done the work of self-awareness is more likely to make the most of it.
Each one of us can be lucky in the short run. We can make a lot of money or score a great job. A life is lived in decades not years. To truly make an impact and a difference, self-knowledge is essential.
Throughout this year we’ll examine the link to performance. We’ll share stories of radical resilience and powerful presence. Of course, we’ll also explore and experiment with tools and tricks to navigate and expand our knowledge and skills.
Be part of the journey in 2020.
Start by subscribing to my mailing list . Subscribers receive:
- My interactive exercise to begin reducing the impacts of stress and feelings of overwhelm will be sent.
- My newsletter with the related podcast episode will be sent weekly.
- Special offers will be available to subscribers monthly including: a random offer of a complimentary one hour coaching conversation, access to roundtable engagements and group coaching on identity and related subjects, as well as information on my special project: #FeMasCon.
Identity Matters in Bank Your Impact (BYI)
Identity really matters. It is foundational to building a progressive, meaningful and successful career. To get what we truly want in life we need to be willing to seek help and take risks. We also need to be willing to question our choices and expand our options through healthy curiosity and a search for unique perspectives. Furthermore, identifying and nurturing our identity is the place to start.
A healthy meaningful and full life is made possible with clarity about our values, beliefs, patterns and habits. Additionally, our quality of life is influenced and shaped by our unique blend of strengths and inclinations. Furthermore, a growth mindset and open-minded approach are foundations to sustaining this healthy sense of self.
The System
The Bank Your Impact (BYI) System is about both developing and embedding self-awareness. Furthermore, the benefits of expanded resilience, connections built on understanding the impact of belonging and an ability to bolster a professional and authentic presence are foundational. Perhaps more than the other two, developing a foundational resilience is critical to with standing that which moves us into burnout.
The current system incorporates 1:1 coaching, roundtable conversations; eventually I’ll add a neuro-social learning experience (currently only available in organizational contracts but will be added to the system for individual engagement in 2021).
My approach is based on the ICF (International Coaching Federation) standards. I’m meeting you (my clients) where you are, both as the coaching agreement begins, and in the moment that exists at the time of each conversation. Progress or growth is not a straight line. The ICA model is the framework for every conversation: Issue/Insight, Choice/Commitment, Action/Accountability. Over the past year I’ve been tightening the model to meet the needs of my clients.
Holding space to support my clients in:
- Developing meaningful insights
- Expanding/deepening perspective on those insights
- Building/designing a practice to try on new ways of being/seeing OR experiment for discovery
- Assessing progress, becoming agile in transfer of learning and application before developing additional insights
An organic experience
The experience is tailored around what you bring to each conversation, in my experience, there are common themes that arise including: self-awareness, mindfulness, mindset, communication, connections, and attitude. Self-awareness stands alone but is also a foundational theme. I have registered upwards of 40 sub-concepts that fit under each of these categories. Furthermore, I bring tools, skills and techniques to respond and guide our work together, informed by positive psychology, neuroscience, and management/leadership research.
Walk With Me, to Where You Want to Be
In all my blog posts in 2019, you will find this section outlines what brought me to this area of focus: supporting people in the early to middle part of their career as a #performance #coach.
You can read more about my work and my in the About Me section of the website and below is a recording of my #bigwhystory:
Feel like you’re living someone else’s destiny?
If that’s working for you, great. If it isn’t or it starts to be a problem, reach out. I welcome a conversation.
Willing to do the work to find more meaning?
With the skills to unpack the emotions and barriers and triggers and mindset challenges with the skills in my BYI system, participants begin to see the impact in their career and finally begin to discover what matters most to them. The bonus: they begin to see a path to get there. Join me…
My system is intended to be meaningful, relevant, accessible and affordable. With that in mind, there are many ways to engage with me. Below are TWO ways to start, without spending a dime.
Walk with Me!
- BOOK a complimentary exploratory 1:1 conversation 20-30 minutes.
- SUBSCRIBE to my mailing list. You’ll receive an interactive exercise that you may use to reduce and manage stress or feelings of overwhelm. PLUS each week you’ll receive my podcast and reflections in your inbox AND you’ll be invited to monthly webinars and roundtable conversations.
In closing, I love bringing learning experiences to workplaces that are interested in raising their performance and encouraging their people.
- Book me to speak at your conference or to a group in your organization. My workshops on building resilience, improving workplace outcomes through relationships, and increasing performance are big hits! In 2020 I’ve added a few workshops on gender engagement – how, by knocking off the boxes that limit us by gender we all find our capacity expands.